For most of my life I've let society and some people around me tell me what I could and couldn't wear, or what I should and shouldn't wear all because I'm in a larger body. For years I let outside influences dictate my style, and then recently I just stopped. I found clothes and brands that I love and I've added clothes to my wardrobe that make me feel confident, happy, pretty! I have stopped dressing like the funny, fat sidekick and instead becoming the leading lady of my own life!
I had been eyeing this Isaac Mizrahi ball skirt on QVC for a while and finally I purchased it. Why did I need it? Because I wanted to have fun and style it! Wouldn't it make me look shorter and fatter? Maybe, but the only way to know for sure was to get it and try it on. What an amazing purchase I have to say! I wore it for an amazing photoshoot with Sara Ella Photography and it was so perfect and so fun for the epic life photos we were going for. (more on the photoshoot soon!)
I wore it again in Vegas paired with Candace Cameron Bure's Silky V-Neck Collared shirt and loved it just as much running around Wynn, hearing my skirt swish around me! Tamy doesn't love my ball skirt, she doesn't not like it, it's just not her favorite thing in my wardrobe and I have to tell you, that's ok with me! I love it, I feel good wearing it, it makes me happy and isn't that important?
Gosh you guys how many times have I been told not to wear something because it hugged my curves instead of hiding them? Countless number of times that's how many and I thought you know what - ridiculous! Why should I hide my body in baggy clothes? Why should my curves be an embarrassment? I was so excited and a little nervous to wear this Ruched Side Dress from Hunter McGrady's All Worth Line. I bought it specifically to wear to my mom's birthday celebration in Vegas and after putting it on I worried that I would look like a sausage, worried that my exposed arm would look too big, that people would see me out and about and laugh at the chubby girl wearing a dress she shouldn't be wearing. But then I got it on and looked in the mirror and thought "wow is that me?!" it was just what I wanted it to be and the only reactions I got to me in this dress were positive ones! I felt like a movie star and for once I didn't feel like I was a frump but rather like I belonged in a Vegas hot spot.
I joke all the time about how cute my dimple on my left shoulder is and when I picked up this shirt - another Candace Cameron Bure piece - I was thrilled that I could show off my cute shoulder. I call this my brunch shirt because I wear it regularly to brunch, I just feel good in it. Cool, chic, sexy and sassy. I will likely pick this up in another color (maybe even two more colors) because I am no longer a believer in hiding my body but finding clothes that I really enjoy wearing and that fit me well at my current size not too tight to encourage me to diet and not so baggy that I hide my curves, style and confidence in the fabric. I know I'm in a larger body and I know society has opinions on what I should wear to cover that body and I'm just not feeding into that business anymore and neither should you! Here are a few easy ways to find your style no matter your size:
Try something new - have you been eyeing an off the shoulder shirt? Maybe a ballgown? Maybe ripped jeans? Something with sparkle? Whatever it is that you have your eye on if it is within your means to buy it do it right now!
Once you get that coveted garment put it on, how do you feel? Self conscious? Nervous? Fabulous? A little bit of all three? Maybe you love how you look in it but you are nervous to wear it out of the house - that's ok. Put it on, set up your self timer, take photos of yourself, walk around the house, have a dance party to your favorite song. How do you feel now? Good? Even if you have to wear this item for an hour a day around the house to gain the confidence to leave the house in it, that is worth doing - you are worth it!!!
Get yourself some trusted advisors. These people should love you for who you are and also be honest with you. I have my three people that I call my council and they consist of my mom and my dear friends Hayden and Martha. They tell me straight up whether things are worth the money, whether things will work for my body type - not that I'm heavy vs being skinny but just my shape vs the cut of the garment. Not one time has the council told me I'm too fat to wear something and with their help I feel like I have really carved out a little style that is all my own - find your tribe to help you do that. People that will make you feel good and give you the push you need to dress any way you want!
Armed with these helpful hints I hope you will start dressing the way you like and stop letting the world around us tell us what we should or shouldn't wear. Be the star of your own story not the frumpy friend, not the comic relief but the star! I'm here rooting for you and if you need a person who has shed many tears in a department store fitting room to give you advice, a push, a shoulder you let me know and I'll be here for you! Send me a photo of one item in your closet that makes you feel amazing! You can email it to me or DM it to me and I will not share it!